Outbreak (1995)

"OH MAH GOD! PEOPLE ARE DY-YING! WE WILL BOMB AND KILL INNOCENT PEOPLE UNTIL THEY ARE DEAD UNLESS SOME HERO GETS HERE QUICKLY!" is what this is about. And Dustin Hoffman is all up in a hazmat suit like "Hey! Look at me! I'm in a hazmat suit and I am going to science you!" and the Morgan Freeman is there to (not narrate) blow your mind, like "I'm a bad guy! Then ultimately a good guy! Because I'm Morgan Freeman!"

Soooooo THEN there's this little girl, right, and she befriends a damn fool monkey and draws pictures of it and has tea parties with it and is then used as a tool to bring that airborn-disease-causing-primate down and everybody is like "YESSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS! No bombs are dropping today!". Sinister.

Boys On The Side (1995)

So, this is a movie about these chicks and they're all like, y'know, kinda like being all like "Nevermind!" about like boys or whatever,

because it's like HelllloOOOO???!!! Girls have more fun. One o' them girls used to start fires... WITH HER MIND.

One o' them wanted to go to California. And then another one. And then yet another one. So then they're all like, "Okay, BYE NICCAAAAAA!", and they do all this stuff (like crying) and then it's all like THE END.